Ageless Pages Reviews - Danielle

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2.5 stars

A moderately engaging look at the French Revolution that suffers from one of the worst romances in recent memory.

Celie Rousseau is a homeless orphan, living in the back alleys of Paris with her savior, Algernon, a boy with revolutionary dreams. They steal from the rich, through a combination of housebreaking and rigged card games, and are feeling quite proud of themselves for it. Until a fellow thief botches his take and theirs, ending with Celie imprisoned, where one of the victims demands that she draw the other criminals to spare her own life.

Celie is a world class artist with an eidetic memory, which is WAY lucky for Marie "Manon" Tussaud (*cough*Grosholtz*cough*,) since she just so happens to need an apprentice to draw the backdrops to her wax figures! The other victim, the evil Comte d'Artois, wants her hanged regardless of skill, but Manon argues for Celie. They agree to a thousand livre bet that Manon can't tame Celie's wild spirit, and the girl is remanded.

Of course, Celie immediately flings herself into the mud and dirties the Comte’s carriage to show just how little she respects royal authority.

From her time spent with Manon and working with Elizabeth at Versailles, Celie starts to realize that maybe the upper class doesn’t have the freedom she suspected. I have almost no problems with this section of the book. The characterizations of Louis and Marie are pretty non-existent, I would have liked any sort of interaction between them and the main characters, but otherwise it’s a nice but unmemorable historical fiction told from an outsider point of view.

And then there’s the goddamn romance.

Algernon is an asshole. He uses Celie for her drawing skills, rejects her advances to become more than friends, then plays the jealous lover when she starts to find friends and family of her own. He constantly berates her for her disloyalty, but never shows himself to be loyal to her. He’s abusive, manipulative slime and when it comes time for the big confrontation, the book has the audacity to play the victim card and let him wiggle out of everything he’s done.

If the worst thing about this novel was the sheer convenience of a street urchin with an eidetic memory and the world’s greatest art skills, I’d probably call it good and recommend it as a short, fun historical romp. But I can’t, because I hate this book. Every quibble is magnified into full blooded hate due to Algernon’s stupid stupidness. I hate the ending and the naivete of thinking revolution can be bloodless. I hate that Marie Tussaud, (*cough*Grosholtz*cough*,) is barely in the book but she and Celie become inseparable mother and daughter any way. I hate the kiss and the final scene on the deck and last minute character changes. There have been a lot of novels written about the French Revolution. Read them.

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Have you ever read a book and knew, knew it would change you, irrevocably, before the end of the first chapter? It’s a rare and powerful thing to behold, but by the time Melanie said she wouldn’t bite, I knew I would never be able to forget her or The Girl With All The Gifts.

I want my readers to do me a favor. I’m going to keep this review vague, but this is the kind of book where everything is a potential spoiler. So don’t read this review. Instead, run, do not walk, to your nearest bookstore and buy the book. Read this book, regardless of your usual preferences. I don’t read horror books. I don’t read thrillers. I don’t read zombie books. This is a five star, genre-defying experience.

Go now.

My enjoyment of this book was night and day from book one. (Get it? Everything and the Moon, Brighter Than the Sun, night and day?)

I only occasionally wanted to kill Charles, which might make him the most tolerable of Quinn's male love interests. I loved Ellie a lot. A LOT a lot. I thought the little mystery was clever and neatly showed that not everyone in a household accepts sudden changes to the status quo. In all, it was a great take on the marriage of convenience plot.

On the negative side, the big mystery at the end was totally silly and felt like it belonged in a different book. Ellie reads completely differently than she did as a side character in Moon, as did her family's motivations.

Still, a significant increase from book one.

I was surprised to find An American Duchess was published by Harlequin, because this is far from a traditional romance novel. We all know the formula: couple meets, falls in love, is driven apart by misunderstanding, reconciles, marries, happily ever after. Those elements are all present in the novel, but it focuses much more on making that impulsive marriage work and if love is actually enough.

Zoe is a new money, New York heiress who has decided on a marriage of convenience in order to access her trust fund. Sebastian is an old world noble with a secret and a desperate financial need. Together they decide to wed and divorce so everyone gets what they want. Except Nigel, Sebastian’s brother and the prideful Duke of Langford, to whom Zoe and divorce represent a modern world with which he can’t cope.

Obviously, Zoe and Nigel fall in love and she becomes the duchess instead of just Lady Hazelton. Even if that wasn’t the title, it’s right there in the blurb. Still, this happens less than halfway through the book and isn’t the true focus of the story. Both characters lost practically everything in World War I. Zoe’s beloved father has passed, as has the love of her life, a flying Ace who taught her everything he knew, and her brother. Nigel is mentally and physically scarred from the fighting. His fiancee left him, his other brother died of influenza and his mother hasn’t recovered. Zoe copes with her grief through fast driving, high flying, and partying ‘til dawn. Nigel turns in on himself, freezing out his family and friends. Shockingly, as they face numerous personal tragedies in their short marriage, these grieving styles don’t work together.

Where the book is best is describing the horror of the war and its impact on civilian life. No one, not the laundress or the Duke, are untouched by loss. I found myself extremely sad for their futures, which finally seem bright, with WW2 on the horizon to take their children and nephews. It’s a point of view I’ve seen a lot of historical novels struggle to relate, which makes it all the more impressive in a so-called “pop fiction” genre.

Unfortunately, my biggest problems with the book are the pacing and Nigel’s reactions to Zoe; both are pretty big issues. The pacing is something of a rollercoaster, with plot points, (like an embezzling lawyer and a suicide,) flashing right past, while other, minor things climb for ages. I had a real issue specifically with the trip to California. The previous chapters are ignored for set pieces that didn’t have enough impact, (the beach and the party specifically,) but feel included to set a Gatsby like atmosphere to counter England. I felt like we either should have moved into that setting a lot sooner or had a tighter focus on the main characters and their relationship turning point.

Nigel came across as alternatively neglectful and overbearing. While Zoe obviously wanted him to fight for her, the artist and the pilot were both eyerolling. And selling all of a woman’s modes of transport while she’s ill? That’s just abusive, Nigel. On the other side of the coin, I understand his coping mechanisms required him to stay away, but the way he treated her after both miscarriages was abominable. Zoe’s not faultless, but I could never take Nigel’s side.

Now, I did like Nigel as a character, and I was rooting for them to make up and make the marriage work. I liked the idea of focusing on the after-the-wedding scenes that we don’t often see in romance novels. The passion was palpable, and the sorrow was heartbreaking. I do wish the pacing had been steadier and some of the rougher relationship patches felt like a slog as Nigel and Zoe rehashed the same arguments over and over. In all, a good read with a few caveats.

10th Discworld book read with my husband, and probably my favorite since we've started.

Rincewind's been my favorite of the reoccurring characters. I'm very sad this is his last book. In my head, he's gone back to the Agatean Empire to live with his true love, Twoflower, forever and ever.

So, I'm about done with Julia Quinn's backlist, and I've finished the complete works of Courtney Milan. I need to know where to go from here! I'm a relatively new, but voracious historical romance reader. I mostly stick to England, with the occasional jaunt to Scotland, but I'm open to anything, anywhere, between 1800 - 1900.

 

I like smart, feisty heroines, banter, and absolutely NO rape/ravishment by the hero. I've already bought an Eloisa James and a Sarah MacLeon, (The Duke is Mine and Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake respectively,) to try, but beyond that? I've heard good things about Lisa Kleypas or Tessa Dare. Maybe? 

 

I'm unfortunately not a fan of Jayne Fresina or Darcy Burke, both of whom were reced for Milan fans. And, just to be more difficult, I'd prefer them to be relatively recent so I can read a sample/borrow from the library if I'm on the fence. I have listed four 5 star reads above for an idea of what I DO like. Can anyone throw a budding reader a bone? 

Minus a star for compromising the heroine, that's never a cute trope.

Plus three stars for ALL THE BANTER.

Plus one star for Julia Quinn.

Plus one star for a TREASURE HUNT.

Minus a half star for how the treasure hunt ended.

Plus one star for copious Lady Danbury.

Minus a half star for getting the song by the same name stuck in my head for THREE DAYS.

Guys, I made a terrible mistake. I may have taken 12 books off my TBR list, but I added TWENTY-THREE. Why do I even have that spreadsheet, when I let these things happen? The only good news is the three library books are already read and returned, so there's only twenty books still on my list. *hysterical sobbing*

 

From publisher for review:

The Jupiter Pirates #2: Curse of the Iris by Jason Fry

Queen of Hearts, Volume Two: The Wonder by Colleen Oakes 

House of the Four Winds by Mercedes Lackey, James Mallory 

Stitching Snow by R.C. Lewis

I Work At A Public Library: A Collection of Crazy Stories from the Stacks by Gina Seridan 

Madame Tussaud's Apprentice by Kathleen Benner Duble 

Salt & Storm by Kendall Kulper

 

B&N Scifi/Fantasy Sale:

Feed by Mira Grant 

Ghost Train to New Orleans by Mur Lafferty

Fade to Black by Francis Knight

Theft of Swords by Michael J. Sullivan

 

Birthday Gifts:

The Maze Runner by James Dashner

Tiger Lily by Jodi Lynn Anderson

The Legend of Eli Monpress by Rachel Aaron

 

Strange Chemistry's Closing, BUY EVERYTHING:

The Assassin's Curse by Cassandra Rose Clarke

The Pirate's Wish by Cassandra Rose Clarke

The Wizard's Promise by Cassandra Rose Clarke

Pantomime by Laura Lam

Shadowplay by Laura Lam

Stolen Songbird by Danielle Jensen

 

I have a grave problem. 

 

HOWEVER, I am 58% done with my reading goal and we're only 50% though the year. Yay, being ahead!

 

Read:

The Magician's Ward by Patricia Wrede - 3 Stars

Something Real by Heather Demetrious - 4 Stars 

Half a King by Joe Abercrombie - 5 Stars (Review)

The Fault In Our Stars by John Green - 2 Stars (Review)

To Sir Philip with Love by Julia Quinn - 3 Stars (Mini Review)

The Nightingale Girls by Donna Douglas - 3 Stars (Review)

Traitor's Blade by Sebastien De Castell - 4 Stars (Review)

Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging by Louise Rennison - 3 Stars

When He Was Wicked by Julia Quinn - 4 Stars (Mini Review)

Queen of Hearts  by Coleen Oates - 4 Stars

Let's Get Lost by Adi Alsaid - DNF

The Rithmatist by Brandon Sanderson - 5 Stars

 

Started by not finished:

 

Feed by Mira Grant - 36% Complete

I Work At A Public Library by Gina Seridan -19% Complete

Dark Triumph by Robin LeFevers - 5% Complete

I love this booooook. It's the best Bridgerton since Benedict and definitely the steamiest Quinn I've seen. Whoa.

Only complaints: it's good Michael got past his guilt, but he could have seen that Francesca was also struggling a lot sooner. He was more than a little manipulative towards the end, too. And, these two say each other's names more than Jack and Rose in Titanic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb5VtLL-JqU (Whole video's gold, but the last 6 minutes is what I'm referring to.)

You're in love, I got that, but if anyone said my name that much during sex, I'd think they were having a stroke.

Really cute and funny and HORRIBLY cringe-worthy. I think if I had fond memories from my own teen years, like Judy Bloom, I'd bump it up to a four.

My emotions have been assaulted. It's terribly rude, to make someone fall in love and then end the book. Really, I just don't see why authors are allowed to "wait" to publish "sequels".

Review to come.

Update 6/29/14:

I have fallen in love Sebastien de Castell’s writing.

Traitor’s Blade opens with a classic, old-school prologue about duty, honor, and the inherent righteousness of our heroes. And then it drops us in the middle of a scene of said heroes guarding a boudoir as their employer deploys fantasy-Viagra to fuck a prostitute all night long. And with this juxtaposition, I fell hard.

Falcio val Mond was the First Cantor of the Greatcoats, the head of a legendary band of roving magistrates, protecting citizens high and low and defending the King’s justice. Unfortunately, the King lost his head and the Greatcoats lost everything. They’re reviled, loathed even, and knights are just itching for the chance to murder the lot.

Falcio, clinging to his ideals, sets out on his final geasa from the King, a journey to find the King’s Charoites, or jewels. He’s reluctantly joined by his best friends Kest, the greatest mortal swordsman, and Brasti, an archer beyond compare. Guarding caravan leaders may just be beneath their skills. Unfortunately, finding a bunch of hidden jewels in a world that despises you isn’t as easy as it sounds. The trio end up in the center of the political unrest that has followed the King’s death.

This leads to the largest portion of the book, the “Blood Week” in Rijou. Does that sound bad? The city is described as, “from a distance it gleamed. I don’t mean it shimmered, nor did it shine; it gleamed, the gleam of oily skin on a corpse, or the gleam in the eye of a man who fancies he can kill you without consequences.” Yeah, everything’s going to go great for Falcio in there. There’s a lot of action, particularly during this section, and it’s well written. There’s also a lot of humor and wit, something you rarely find in this genre. Even more interesting is Falcio’s obvious depression, bordering on suicidal, which serves as a counterpoint to Brasti’s easy humor and Kest’s stoic honor.

There are three scenes that concern me and kept me from giving the book a higher score. The first is a flashback to Aline, Falcio’s wife, being fridged. This is an unfortunate trope to start with, but when the woman agrees to let herself be raped to save both their lives and their home, rides the villain like a demon, gives him the best sex ever, (despite being raped,) and is then brutally murdered anyway to set the main character on his quest for revenge and redemption? Problematic at best, fucking-gross-Jesus-fuck-why-would-you-DO-that?!? at worst.

The second is Falcio’s night with Ethalia. The consent is questionable, the motivations are thin, and the conclusion felt rushed and out of nowhere. The spiritual cleansing of your main character shouldn’t read like a last minute, obligatory sex scene requested by the publisher.

And the last is the thrilling conclusion. Again, it felt rushed. Without spoiling too much, the acceptance of a new member of the Musketeers was frankly crazy. They pretty much literally went with “a wizard did it” to wave everything away. I’m left with so many questions: Why didn’t the soft candy work on little Aline, but it did on Falcio? Where did the Duchess get a Saint? How did any single thing the Tailor did actually work? Why was the King’s actual freaking plan, “leave a bunch of bastards around the country for after I die”? And WHY DID I FIGURE THAT OUT A HUNDRED PAGES BEFORE FALCIO?

Traitor’s Blade is a fantastic high fantasy that should appeal to fans of Sanderson or Lynch, which I am and which it does. It does have a bit of a Three Musketeers flavor at points, but it didn’t feel derivative. The twists are engaging and (for the most part) exciting, though somewhat expected. It’s funny and sharp. I was never bored, and I’m extremely excited for the next in the series. I strongly recommend it.

I like Call The Midwives on BBC, so when I received a NetGalley email advertising a historical fiction novel that was supposed to be very similar, I decided to take a chance outside my usual time periods and give it a whirl.

The Nightingale Girls follows three trainee nurses in 1930s London. There’s Dora, the poor-but-hardworking East End girl, accepted to the prestigious Nightingale Teaching Hospital because she reminds the new Matron of herself and her roommates; Millie, the dissatisfied Lady, fleeing her responsibilities for fun and sense-of-purpose; and Helen, the bookish but sad daughter of a powerful hospital trustee. They’re pretty easily recognizable tropes, but due to very varied home lives and tragic pasts, all three are unique to read.

Unfortunately, I wanted nursing and class struggles, similar to the show the publishers are drawing comparisons to. What I got was three 200 page romances. Dora undergoes some teasing and almost fails an exam because she can’t afford a book, but otherwise, her different background doesn’t factor much into the story. Likewise, the book only shows one or two classes and then moves on to using the wards as set dressing. There are patients, some of them are sick, sometimes the girls are required to attend them, but large swathes of the book feature no more nursing than cleaning and making tea.

Instead, each girl is given a romance that takes up the large majority of this very long novel. One falls for a boy from home, one is trapped in a love triangle between a good friend and a baaad boy, and one, the most interesting and consequently best, falls for a patient of a different class. I don’t mind romance, and I was expecting a love interest for each, but it drives too much of the book. The girls claim they don’t want to get married and leave their beloved jobs, but I didn’t find that to be the case based on the narration.

There are a lot of subplots and four or five other POVs that make brief appearances to drive them. The new Matron is too modern and her assistant and the trustees don’t approve. The mean girl has problems at home. One of the love interests has problems at home. Someone knows secrets about someone else. Three teachers knit and have tea. None of it’s bad, in fact it’s good to give villains motivation, but the book is too long by half and these detours frequently pulled away from the little action in the main story.

Still, I like Millie a lot, one romance really gave me the feels, and I’m kind of interested in a modern Matron at a very old-fashioned school. Unfortunately, I’m very against rape as a plot point, particularly child sexual abuse, and it’s deployed liberally in one backstory. I don’t think it was necessary and the resolution where: the love interest drives the abuser away, without talking to the victims, because his brother overheard them fighting, made me feel scummy. Something about it felt like the victim is his property now, so the abuser left. It’s even more disappointing because the victim had previously displayed some savvy, outsmarting the abuser, and then completely lost her head and couldn’t see that he’d taken a new victim. The character progression felt off. With the exception of that one plot point, there’s nothing wrong with The Nightingale Girls. It just wasn’t particularly interesting, either.

Not my favorite Bridgerton or Quinn novel. I feel like she's gone to the well of "compromising position so we must wed" too many times. Anthony continues to be my least favorite character in a romance. In history. Seriously jackass, you are not her father and you did the same! thing!

I never fell in love with Phillip and his speech in the portrait gallery about how Eloise wasn't allowed to be unhappy because his last marriage was worse certainly didn't win him any points. I did like that he was a widower with children, which added a different wrinkle to the formula. I liked the scene where he and the brothers kiss and make up.

Eloise doesn't read any differently from Daphne, which doesn't give me faith in the next book.

In all, a humdrum effort.

The Fault in Our Stars is an undeniable phenomenon. The book has sold millions of copies. John Green is routinely five of the NYT top 10 YA books. The movie made $48m in its first weekend. My beloved co-blogger gave it four stars and has shared how emotional it makes her.

Sorry nerdfighters, I can’t stand this book.

The hype train got me, and with the movie coming out, I wanted to give it a chance, but there’s a lot working against TFIOS and me. First, I knew the twist going in. That probably sucks a lot of the emotion out of the reveal. Second, I’m only just becoming a fan of the contemporary genre and I still don’t like melodramas. But unfortunately, the biggest problem with the book is the writing and characterization.

John Green has spent a lot of time waxing about how he doesn’t write manic pixie dream girls, and I’ll agree, Hazel is not a MPDG. No, in this book, Mr. Green has written the first manic pixie dream guy in Augustus Waters.

I was completely unable to invest in Hazel and Augustus’ love story, because Gus is so inherently unlikable. He’s vain, pretentious, and doesn’t listen to what Hazel actually wants. He continually calls her “Hazel Grace”, despite being repeatedly told it’s just Hazel, because it’s what he likes. He plans this way over the top picnic and puts her on the spot, without thought of what she likes, how the food tastes, or the fact that such a big gesture makes it impossible to say no. The only time the character ever feels human is as the plane takes off. That’s a huge issue.

I did like Hazel, though I wish she’d shown a bigger array of emotions. She faces crushing disappointment and loss with the same apathy she applies to being forced to go to her support group. I actually liked that she got mad at her parents, terminally ill people are allowed to get mad, I just wish there’d been a bit more. Still, she felt like an actual person, (of course that’s because she is and that’s a whole other kettle of fish,) unlike her “love” interest.

I’ll admit, I teared up twice. Once during Isaac’s pre-funeral eulogy and once during his actual eulogy. I liked Isaac. In those two scenes, I actually felt humanity in Augustus. Why didn’t his girlfriend make me feel those feelings?

There’s just too many problematic things in the book. Gus’s pushiness. Hazel’s passiveness. That fucking kiss. No, seriously, that kiss killed any chance this book had. I was disgusted. And to have the Dutch people clap at the disrespectful American teenagers? Cancer perks indeed.

Read This Review & More Like It At Ageless Pages Reviews

"'Oh I'm forever swearing oaths: I hardly know which ones to honor'"

Prince Yarvi is the youngest son of a powerful warmonger king. What's worse, he was born crippled, with half a hand. Yarvi is a disappointment to his family, his country, and himself. And he's just been crowned. Instead of sitting the Black Chair and celebrating his betrothal, he makes a vow to avenge his father and brother.

Over the course of the book he acquires some unlikely companions, all of whom are amazing. There's the former guard, the mysterious swordsman, and the action girl that we've seen from countless other fantasy novels, but they all have depth and twists to keep them from being stock characters. 

Half a King is a classic revenge tale, with shades of The Count of Monte Cristo, but it's also a fascinating character study in growth and coming of age. Yarvi from chapter one to the final pages is almost unrecognizable, yet in a brilliant stroke of writing, you'll find a lot of parallels from the first chapters in the last.

I'm loathe to reveal much of the plot, as there are some big twists, so what I really want to focus on and praise is Abercrombie's writing. The world building is fascinating, evoking Vikings and barbarians, but with very different religious influence. I would love to know why he decided to flip the traditional script and build almost a matriarchal institution with Mother War and Father Peace, Mother Sun and Father Moon. While the leaders are men, women wield terrific political power as both treasurer and chief advisers to the kings. I'm also very interested in the glimpses of the long dead Elf race, because(view spoiler)

If I have one complaint, it's the book's size. For epic fantasy, it's pretty short and that does show in Yarvi and the companion's journey through the winter tundra. It's a very tense time that's supposed to be a struggle for survival, but because of the time devoted to the journey, I never felt the party's desperation. I wish there had even been one more chapter to ramp up the tension and make me feel the danger. Beyond that, I can't find fault.

I've been a fan of the idea of Joe Abercrombie for a long time. I always want to like his books more than I end up enjoying them. He's always been missing one element that would really cause me to connect with his characters. With Half a King, he's made a true believer of me. It's a master work and probably the fantasy novel of the year.

Double digits! Read 10, DNF'd none. I only bought Dark Triumph in ebook, added Lark Ascending, The Nightingale Girls, and Traitor's Blades ARCs. I did get in 3 library books, but they're all finished and returned.

 

I'm trying to get my ARCs read and reviewed a month out, which I've done GREAT on the last two months. I only have three expected to publish in July, but two of them are longer fantasy novels, so we'll see if I can keep momentum up. 

 

Read:

 

Grave Mercy by Robin LaFevers - 4 Stars

The Truth About Alice by Jennifer Mathieu - 4 Stars (Review)

I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends by Courtney Robertson - 3.5 Stars (Review)

Being Sloane Jacobs by Lauren Morrill - 3.5 Stars

As The Last Petal Falls by Jessica Woodard - 4 Stars

Dreams of Gods and Monsters by Laini Taylor - 4 Stars

Lola and the Boy Next Door by Stephanie Perkins - 5 Stars (Review)

The Prank List by Anna Staniszewski - 3 Stars (Review week of 6/1)

Second Helpings by Megan McCafferty - 4 Stars

Curtsies & Conspiracies by Gail Carriger - 4 Stars 

 

Started, not finished:

 

Half a King by Joe Abercrombie - 9% Complete

The Magician's Ward by Patricia Wrede (reread) - 96% Complete